Eh.

So it's Monday now. The disease caught up with me pretty badly, inspite of the billion health aimed soups and garlics I consumed.. It was actually the longest disease I've ever had. It wasn't very strong, but it was rather uncomfortable. It felt like a light cold that never ended. I've been sick now for a whole week, although I'd say today is the first day where I can function normally.
I didn't get a fever, however my nose/head/ear etc suffered.. My right ear was deaf for quite a while, my nose entirely stuffed, I was coughing like mad etc.
I haven't been in school the whole last week, so the guild has built itself up.
I also feel a bit avoidant, and my dayrythm has been entirely destroyed.
But I've gained some clarity, as well as I've gotten a chance to get used to the idea of quitting drinking.. As an alcoholic mind (never let myself become an alcoholic entirely, but it still got in the way of alot) this was rather difficult.. I've also caught up with alot of geography (: As well as I've followed the lessons at home, since I was too sick to attend.
So the guild isn't entirely consuming. I know I'll have quite some time on my hand, now that there won't be 2 drunken days and one insane hangover every week.
I wanna do a good job and make up for the time missed. As well as make up for the time wasted in my life.

This past week was really entertaining. I haven't done anything extreme, but I've been watching all Harry Potter movies, all LoTR movies (and I always hated those movies, but I've grown to like them now), 300, The Patriot and Young Adult (went to the cinema yesterday. This movie was awesome. The main character is a lot like me. Bought plenty of candy, there were only 2 other people in the cinema so lolz.. I had to cough alot, as it was my first time going out in a whole + cold air. Enjoyed myself plenty).
I love Legolas <3 I love Lucious and Draco Malfoy <3 I love the hawt guy from 300 (No recall his name, but his head gets chopped off.. And he's the son of someone).
So yeah, I've turned into a teeny bopper fangirl in this time of my disease.

Tomorrow will be a fresh start. I have some more decisions to make though.
I don't know what to do with the social. I think I might prefer to be a loner from now on, yes.
I also need to get a jumpstart on weightloss. Quitting alcohol and drinking diet coke instead of normal coke isn't enough.. My system is so fucked that I could eat a banana + decent dinner and still not lose a single kilogram. My body is used to eating too little, drinking too much, or eating too much of the right things.. Aka, I can binge on a cabbage and carrot.. And hell, I'm insane enough to binge in 1k calories on that stuff.
I'm so lucky to enjoy healthy foods, and not have a taste for the bads, with my binge abilities.
Need to find something else to focus my emotional tension on.
Maybe selfcare.. Facial masks, fixing nails, feet etc.
Might help boost my self-esteem and make me feel good at moments I generally feel down.. Hell if I know, I've never been good at channeling my negative emotional tension anywhere else than into a can of beer.

Well, for now my goal is to balance my eating a little.. I notice that my binge problems are enhanced now that I replace meals with protein/nutrition shakes.. So as ideal as it feels to be "eating" like this, I might wanna look into better alternatives.
I hope to have 3 meals a day, maybe only one of them with those shakes.. Since I do love to drink them, I hate eating in the morning for example, and I'm way too lazy to actually make something appropriate.
Maybe I should have a lunch meal that's a little more solid, just to not shock my stomach with real food when dinner arrives. Not entirely sure what that could be, but I'm sure I can work my magic with some crispbread and random veggies, potentially some cheese.
Then I need to balance my dinners.
Or even better, start with a real meal, do the shake as a "lunch" or midmeal. Pretty sure I won't be ordering more of those in the future anyhow, so when the moment comes I'll switch to a self-made smoothie. Orange juice, banana + pineapple or something like that.
Well, writing about it most certainly gave me some decent ideas.

Since I can't afford proper exercise, I intend to do some exercises on my own at home. Mostly to strengthen my back. Maybe walk Nitro a little more often and more efficiently.

I'm also a little uncertain of my WoW life now.. I knew the commitment fear would catch up with me at some point. I think it's more me wanting to raid with Narcosis though. She has the most achivements, mounts, memories and she's a character I love to evolve with.
It also feels wrong having my priest as a draenei, but as long as she's my main, she's got to be a draenei :P
Well, for now I'm not gonna back out.. Maybe I will in the future, time will tell.

Ok, well I hope to balance things in my life.. I hope that my decision to quit on alcohol will help this change. I will ofc drink on occasions (Stalker mode, important parties, school events), but not on a regular basis. As long as I'm in school, the drinking will be kept to after exams and until school start - only.

Might have an exception next weekend or so, though.. There's a stripclub, and I really wanna go :P